American Horror Story: Coven “The Replacements” Review (3×03)

24 Oct

627-16Can minotaurs even have sex? That’s what I want to know.

This episode of AHS turns the insane up another notch, delivering minotaur masturbation, Frankenstein incest, and a voodoo throne with an iPad. Nothing’s particularly surprising too see, but it’s certainly disturbing and tasteless; I wonder how long this can sustain itself, but as of right now, it’s humming along quite nicely.

First up, let’s take a look at Madame LaLaurie and Queenie. This relationship is absolutely fascinating to watch, and I hope the fact that Queenie comes to the Madame’s defense isn’t an indication of a lessening in conflict. I guess we had to get that minotaur scene in there somewhere, but the dynamic between the former slave owner acclimating to the 21st century and the indignant black witch is priceless. I will say, though, that I’m not all that fond of the way race is touched on in this show. Fiona’s throwaway line about not being racist is pretty much Murphy trying to use his main character’s ideas as justification for his own. It’s like, “Hey, Jessica Lange isn’t racist! On to more slave torture scenes!” Anyway, speaking of that minotaur scene….yeah, let’s maybe not.

Another scene we probably shouldn’t speak of is the incest one between Kyle and his mother. Peters is doing a great job with his Frankenstein-esque role, but this storyline is disturbing while at the same time being completely normal in the realm of AHS. It isn’t as graphic as it could have been, but it’s once again Coven‘s own brand of crazy.

Cordelia’s storyline isn’t the snake sex crazy we had last week, but I’m happy she’s starting to interact with more characters; pretty much anyone placed in the same room as Bassett will be overshadowed, but Paulson does a nice job of conveying her desperation throughout; Cordelia’s been sidelined from the main action these first few weeks, and it’s starting to become clearer how exactly she’ll fit into the rest of the story.

That main story is obviously revolving around Fiona, Madison, and Zoe. It’s really entertaining watching Lange chew up the scenery, and she makes the other characters all the better for it. I have to say I was looking forward to seeing the Fiona-Madison dynamic expanded upon, but it looks like it won’t happen due to the bloodbath in the final 10 minutes. On the one hand, it’s a shocking moment and gets the “Who’s the Supreme?” question out of the way, but on the other hand, I’m not certain we won’t see Emma Roberts again. Hey, I’d take back every bad thing I’ve ever said about Ryan Murphy if he brought back Dylan McDermott and found a way to make him the Supreme.



-That conversation about age between Madison and Fiona really is accurate, isn’t it? Now that is a well-drawn parallel between the ideals of today and the AHS world.

-“This coven doesn’t need a new Supreme. It needs a new rug.” All the awards to Jessica Lange.

-LaLaurie’s reaction to Obama is absolutely priceless.

-Angela Bassett playing Solitaire on her iPad on her voodoo throne is both terrifying and hilarious.

-Lily Rabe is fantastic. She’s done amazing things with a character that could’ve easily been terrible.

-Denis O’Hare is still standing there.

-“On the day of, bring us two ounces of your husband’s baby gravy in a Mason jar.”

-“He’s so backed up, all I’d have to do is say ‘panties’ and he’d jizz in his jeans.” I’ll miss you, Madison, if you’re actually gone. Knowing the show, Cordelia will give birth to you or something.

Credit to FX and American Horror Story: Coven for all pictures. I own nothing.

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